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[personal profile] sinnatious
Hey, remember those Xmas Giftfic prompts? Yes, I know Christmas was a month ago, everyone should know to expect this from me by now.


For [livejournal.com profile] caterfree10
A. Final Fantasy VII
B. Cissnei and Kunsel
C. Continuing from the fic that my prompt inspired from last year's batch, tell us about Cissnei and Kunsel's bodyswap adventure.
AN: I kind of feel like I copped out on a lot of potential hijinks here, but that would need chapters and I'm pretty sure would eventually result in civilian casualties. I hope this somewhat satisfies regardless.


Kunsel blinked, and found himself standing on the roof as the elevator dinged in front of him.

Wind whipped through his hair. He wasn’t wearing his helmet. That was his second warning something was wrong.

He glanced down. Suit. Executive? But there was a sidearm on his hip. Turk then. And… Well, would you look at that. Breasts. Score.

The elevator opened. He stepped inside, catching a quick glance of his reflection in the polished metal of the doors. Cissnei, was it? Zack’s Turk friend.

He checked his pockets for a pass card to activate the elevator. Cissnei’s face stretched into an uncharacteristically wide smile when he found it.

Senior Turk Level Security Clearance?

Materia mishaps hadn’t ever been this nice to him before.

………………..

Cissnei blinked, and found herself in what appeared to the Equipment Room of the SOLDIER floor.

Not a big deal, really. Except she was quite certain that she’d been waiting for the elevator on the roof two seconds ago. And hadn’t intended to venture anywhere near the SOLDIER floor today.

Her hand dropped to her side, reaching for the reassurance of a weapon… and found a pouch of mastered materia instead.

That wasn’t right.

And why was she wearing a helmet?

Hands – not her hands, too large, and the callouses were all in the wrong places, broadsword instead of guns and shuriken – ran carefully over her body.

No breasts. And – that, now that she was paying attention, was definitely a penis. And balls.

His body then.

Materia mishap? She’d certainly dealt with the fallout of enough of them, though the Turks themselves were mostly spared the experience – that particular misfortunate usually fell to the Materia Department, or SOLDIERs who were the most frequent materia users, or troopers from the Security Department who had the misfortune of being around said SOLDIERs.

Although this was clearly a SOLDIER uniform, so that ruled out a gender swap. Body swap then. With a Second Class, at least. Zack? But then she was wearing a helmet, and she’d never seen Zack wear a helmet, so…

She needed a mirror. She cast about, leaving the Equipment room. There would be a bathroom somewhere on the floor…

Bingo. And empty. Perfect.

She ignored the line of urinals and headed straight for the sink and mirror. She slipped the helmet off her head and…

Had no idea who she was looking at.

Brown hair. The typical glowing eyes, a shade more teal than blue, suggesting they’d been closer to green to begin with. No identifying scars or other marks.

It couldn’t be helped. Not all SOLDIERs were as notorious as Zack. Career SOLDIER perhaps, one who’d made it to Second Class after a lengthy stint in Third but didn’t have the talent to go further. She fished in his pockets, searching for some sort of ID. He had to have a pass card at least… there. SOLDIER Second Class Kunsel.

The name sounded vaguely familiar, maybe from a mission log, or mentioned in passing conversation.

Interesting, but low-priority. First order of business was to inform Tseng and get someone to cover her duties, and then find out where exactly Kunsel – presumably in her body, and there would be blood if he’d treated it with anything less than the utmost respect – was. With that in mind, loitering in the SOLDIER lounge or Equipment room would likely be the best option. She’d been in transit, whereas Kunsel would know to look for her on the SOLDIER floor.

Probably best she avoided moving around then. Surely he had a PHS… her (his) fingers landed a familiar block of plastic. She let out of a huff of annoyance when she activated it. Another customised model – why couldn’t he have just stuck with the standard menus…

Cissnei paused when she accidentally clicked on the message folder. There were…. hundreds. Just in the past week. Who had time for that?

That wasn’t what caught her eye though. It was the subject headings.

With greater and greater urgency, she scrolled through message after message. Extra-marital affairs in the Space Program? Scarlett awarding contracts due to a weakness for pretty boy vendors? Associate Secretary Lazard’s upcoming promotion because of *wink wink* family relations? The Security Department assisting in a cover up because one of their senior officers had been drunk on the scene and lost classified documents?

It might have all been couched in lurid gossip, but it didn’t change the facts behind the juicy scandals. She didn’t know about half of this, and she was a Turk!

Cissnei completely forgot about notifying Tseng and bolted for the elevator.

………………..

With only a Second Class’s security clearance, it took far, far too long for Cissnei to make it to the Department of Administrative Research. And then she’d had to avoid the other Turks, because there wasn’t time to explain why a SOLDIER Second Class was on the floor. The only saving grace was that she could use her key code to override the entrance to her office without needing her pass card.

It had only been a hunch, but she hadn’t actually suspected to find her counterpart sitting at her desk, drinking coffee and using her computer.

Kunsel – wearing her face, and did she ever grin like that? – glanced over, and completely nonchalantly, said, “Hey. Took you long enough.”

She stormed over, and felt a lot more threatening doing it in a SOLDIER’s body than normal. “Procedure is you notify a commanding officer of a materia mishap immediately.”

Kunsel shrugged. “I did try, but the General was acting sort of strange. His secretary kept muttering about him smiling at her. Do you think he’s finally cracked?”

As though summoned by the words, that was when Sephiroth dragged Zack in.

“Cissnei, Kunsel, hi!” he yelped. “Um, I can explain-!”

…………….

Once they had been properly restored to their bodies, and Zack thoroughly chastised, Cissnei gave Kunsel ten minutes before tracking him down to finish their aborted conversation.

She didn’t have to go far. He was leaning on the wall by the Equipment Room entrance on the SOLDIER floor, idly scrolling through his PHS. “Cissnei,” he greeted. “Fancy seeing you again so soon.”

“You’re not naïve enough to think I would let you go, are you?” she asked. The contents of his PHS had caught her off guard, but Cissnei was a professional.

“I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”

“The Turks don’t look kindly on security leaks,” she said pleasantly, and knew her opponent would hear the threat in her words as clearly as a brandished knife.

In response, Kunsel just grinned and asked, “Does Zack know who founded his fanclub?”

Cissnei froze. “…You wouldn’t.”

Kunsel’s growing smile suggested that he would, in fact, enjoy it.

It was a shame they’d missed recruiting him to the Turks.

It was terrifying that he’d been missed.

“Maybe,” she conceded, “We can come to some sort of agreement.”





For [livejournal.com profile] firedraygon97
A: FFVII TFA
B: Cloud +/- anyone else
C: The Gold Saucer is hosting a grand prix-type chocobo race, and Cloud has a need for speed.
AN: Fezastwin, this could maybe partially be considered a fill for your prompt too!


ShinRa, for all of its exploitation, had at some point in the past recognised that things such as ‘battle fatigue’ and ‘stress’ and ‘overwork’ existed, and that these things not only reduced productivity, but in the case of certain departments became actively dangerous. To both the employee and, more importantly, anything or anyone in said employee’s vicinity.

So every year at some point or another, usually after particularly taxing missions, nearly every SOLDIER got sent on a compulsory company sponsored holiday outside of Midgar. Normally to Costa Del Sol, but also to Junon, and on this particular occasion, the Gold Saucer.

“This is the best,” Zack declared, because even though everyone already knew it, it deserved repeating. “Who would have thought that they’d open the Battle Arena to SOLDIERs? I mean, isn’t that unfair?” He tossed his shiny new materia in the air as proof.

“Most people would consider including a dragon in the final round unfair,” Kunsel pointed out.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t like it was a big dragon. Although I wonder how they caught it in the first place.” He spun the materia in his hands one more time before tucking it away. “Hey, where did Cloud go? I haven’t seen him since we hit the Speed Square.”

“There’s a Chocobo Grand Prix on, he said he was going to check it out.”

“Chocobo Grand Prix?! Why didn’t you say something sooner? C’mon!” Zack grabbed his friend by the arm and hauled him towards the Chocobo Square with SOLDIER speed. Kunsel could keep up after all, even if he groaned about it.

In a whirlwind of gil and activity, bets were placed, seats secured, and Kunsel and Zack were sitting in the stands, arms laden with snacks. “This is gonna be great!” Zack cheered.

Kunsel grabbed for the drinks. “Hey, don’t hog it all. Who did you bet on, anyway?”

“Number 5, of course.”

“Seriously? The payout stinks. Odds are too high to make it worth it.”

“Yeah, but Number 5 is racing a black chocobo. There’s nothing faster. Why would you put your money on anything else?” Zack declared triumphantly. Ha! For once he knew more about something than Kunsel did!

“I thought you might have put your money on Cloud, though,” Kunsel offered in amusement.

Zack blinked. Processed that. Then… “Wait, Cloud’s racing?”

“I said he was going to check out the Grand Prix, didn’t I?”

“There’s a huge difference between ‘checking out’ and competing! I didn’t even know he knew how to ride chocobos! Isn’t he more a motorbikes kind of guy?”

“Chocobos at top speed can go as fast as a motorbike, you know,” remarked Kunsel.

“Have you seen Cloud ride a motorbike? I don’t think they can.” Zack’s words were fervent. That had been a harrowing mission.

The warning horn blared, and the jockeys brought their birds to the starting stables. Kunsel elbowed him. “See? He’s wearing the purple vest, Number 3.”

Damn, it really was him. “He’s only on a yellow, though.” Zack squinted. “It’s a good bird at least, I guess. I don’t know enough about chocobos to tell, but it seems really, um, healthy?” Now he was torn between cheering for his bet or backing his buddy.

Kunsel just grinned at him. Zack was instantly suspicious.

Then the starting pistol cracked, and he realised why.

Cloud streaked out of the stables. Even the black was left in his dust. The audience was left with mouths agape as the jockey and bird pulled away from the group with every stride, not even slowing down on the change of terrain. No way even an S-class yellow chocobo could-

Unless…

Kunsel answered before he could ask. “It’s a Gold. Bred it himself.”

“When the hell does he have time for all this?” Zack lamented.

Kunsel just patted his back in commiseration.



For Anon
A. Dissidia: Fallacious Deity
B. Tidus and other characters as needed
C. Whether Tidus disappears before making it home, makes it home only to disappear, or finds a way to not disappear and the Dissidia crew's reaction to not being told what was happening with him.
AN: I am sort of impressed at how year by year, you guys wring a sequel out of me one prompt at a time.


Sasune was quaint, in a word. Too backwater for Squall’s tastes. He would never in a hundred years admit it out loud, but he missed Garden and its modern conveniences. Enough of castles and barren wastelands already. He wanted an airship again.

Cloud’s approach to the forest clearing was announced by the crush of dry leaves underfoot and the erratic flutter of Cid’s wings. “You’re already here then. Onion Knight asked after you.”

“Drawn out goodbyes aren’t my thing.”

Cloud shrugged a shoulder and didn’t press the issue. It was one of his qualities Squall had reluctantly come to appreciate.

The silence stretched for several beats before Squall’s impatience kicked in. “Where’s Tidus?”

“Down at the river. Wanted to freshen up before we go.”

Taking his time, as always. Scoffing, Squall pushed off from his tree trunk and stalked into the forest. “I’ll go get him.” He’d take forever otherwise.

Cloud simply nodded and let him go.

The river wasn’t far, and there were only so many paths to it from Sasune. It wasn’t long at all until he spied a head of bleach-blond hair through the leaves. “Hey-”

The SeeD cut himself off as he stepped past the tree line. Tidus stood by the river, as expected, holding his arm up to the sky as though to block the sun. But he looked almost transparent, pearly swirls of coloured light swimming across his skin and clothes, motes of light drifting upward.

Then just as quickly, it was gone, and Tidus was blinking at him. “Sorry, did you say something?”

“What the hell was that?”

Tidus just grinned. “What are you talking about?”

He stared at the blitzballer. The smile remained.

Whatever. None of his business. Probably just his imagination anyway. “We’re ready to go.”

“Already?” He stuck his hands in his pockets, face still tilted towards the sun, as though savouring its warmth. “Feels like we just got here.”

They’d been here for three days already. Because Onion Knight had wanted to introduce all of his friends, and Cloud and Tidus were both too soft to just dump the kid and go.

The blitzballer bent over the river, looking into the depths. “Did you know there are fish in here? I wonder if we could catch some. There might not be food in the next world.”

“If it’s the wrong world we’re not likely to stick around long enough for food to be a problem.” And knowing Onion Knight, he had probably thought ahead and foisted supplies onto Cloud anyway. “…Are you done? Today would be nice.”

“Yeah yeah, I’m coming. Let’s go.”

Cloud was still waiting when they arrived back in the clearing, and greeted them with nothing more than a short nod. Cid bobbed in the air, tiny purple bat wings fluttering to keep him improbably aloft. “Tidus next, then? I already have the calculations.”

The pause before Tidus answered stretched several beats too many to be natural. Then, like flicking a switch, a smile spread over his face. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess it’s about time.” His sentence ended strangely soft, almost as though he was talking to himself. He shoved his hands in his pockets, staring up at the sky again, the sun leaving patterns on his face through the leaves. “Gotta say though, I’ve kind of enjoyed it.”

“You’d be the only one,” Squall muttered sourly. Tidus just slanted him a cheesy grin. “Cid, get on with it.”

The moogle didn’t need any further prompting. The forests of Sasune dissolved into a whirl of colours and light, passing in a dizzying rush. For several long moments they were airless, weightless, and wrapped in stifling silence, before it slammed back into them all at once, heat and scent and sound, cloyingly humid air and bright sunlight and the crash of waves on an ocean shore.

They landed on a beach ringed with sickeningly bright greenery, sunlight dancing on dappled waves. The sand beneath his boots was nearly white, the air a strangely sweet mix of fragrant pollen and ocean brine.

“First try, huh? You’re getting good at this, Cid.”

“…Tidus?” There was a note of alarm in Cloud’s voice that had Squall whirling around with his gunblade half-drawn.

There was no enemy though. Simply Tidus, surrounded by trailing motes of light. Like opalescent fireflies, drifting from his body.

“Ah, yeah. I guess this is where we say goodbye, right?” Tidus hooked his strangely transparent ­– fading – arms behind his head and grinned. “It’s been fun. Hey Cid, don’t let these guys get too gloomy okay? I know you’ll make it back.”

This didn’t sound right. Not like the other goodbyes. “What are you-?”

“We’re back. This is my world. We’re in the right place,” Tidus said, as though that explained everything.

Squall didn’t get it, but the sudden tension in Cloud’s posture suggested that he did. “Tidus.” There was an odd thread of urgency to his voice that Squall had never heard before. “Your story – how does it end?”

“My story?” Tidus’s grin didn’t falter, even as his form faded further. “…My story has already ended.”

Then Squall got it.

He remembered now where he’d seen something like those mysterious lights before. Around Jecht, when Chaos’s power was fading from the world. Pyreflies, he’d called them.

“Why did you say anything?” Squall demanded.

“Didn’t want to be a downer. Besides, not like it could change anything, right?”

All those times when he’d dragged his feet, or cajoled them into staying in one of the nicer worlds for just one more day. “Idiot. You could have kept travelling with us. Could have stayed in one our worlds.” Sasune, or Baron, or hell, even Balamb Garden.

“Nah. It was all borrowed time, right from the start,” Tidus said. “Just… I wanted to go for as long as I could, you know? But I was cutting it a bit close. Didn’t want to risk fading in another world. I have to go back to the Farplane eventually.” He shrugged and tossed them another easy smile. “The dream has to end someday.”

“Tidus-” Cloud started.

“No drawn out goodbyes, right?” He waved a nearly transparent hand. “See ya!”

Then he was gone in a burst of pyreflies, and they were left only with the sound of crashing waves.
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